Fucking study.

My exam will be on Thursday and still I'm not done with the study. Worse of all things it's like I can't remember a single thing of all the things I studied. My life sucks. My first exam will be a complete failure and my English is terrible today.

Something I already know

My destiny is to die suffocate, it's something I already know.
My lungs perhaps won't stand what I'm doing to them anymore and will stop working. Apnea is terrible, I found it by myself. That need of inhale air that doesn't want to stay inside, my heart that beats harder and faster and it's about to explode inside my cage. The humiliation of knowing that people are staring at me with pity and I still can't breathe. The dependence on medicines and all that stuffs. And I'm still hurting myself.

Day two

Couldn't sleep tonight. I don't really know why.
I think it was 4:00 am when I finally fell asleep and I think that this is most his fault.
Being alone in the bed at night is not a good thing when you're upset. It doesn't help.

First comment

Just trying, as usual.
I was missing having a blog or at least a place in which I could write everything i wanted to.
Social networks are useful but there's nothing better than a blog.