I don't know what I'm doing.
I don't understand if I feel down because of my behavior or because of the way I feel about this.
I've been too husty... and still it seemed like I had been waiting for too long.
He's not the right person for me. He only gets me nervous and lately I hate when he touches me.
Not to mention when he talks.
I was attracted by the way he talked, his way of thinking, I thought he was very mature for his age and that he could understand me.
Okay, we do share same tastes, more or less, but he doesn't understand me.
Literaly.
I think I got the wrong idea of him in my mind, because when we started being more intimate about our personal issues I realized how childish he is and how much he doesn't takes nothing for serious.
He told me, I should have known. I just thought it was a little lack of self-esteem, but this is too much.
He thinks he is an idiot e doesn't do a thing to demonstrate the contrary or just improve himself. It's like he built a personality back in the days we were just dating and now he's incapable of keeping it. He's giving the worse of himself.
He's invadent, 'sticky', I am not like that and I don't need that.
I need a man, a person who knows how to live. I'm almost an adult, I need an adult by my side.
He can't manage to get out of highschool.
Three years in between are too much. Next time someone says otherwise I'll kill them. I swear.
The fact that HE is still somewere in my mind, really doesn't help.
